Famous Fake Quotes of Teddy Roosevelt #3 – Texas Tee

The blood of the true patriot is slick as oil, and you’ll find more of both in Texas than the entire Eastern Seaboard put together. Theodore Roosevelt August 12, 1907 Washington, DC President Roosevelt honored his dear friend and former U.S. Senator from Texas, Roger Quarles Mills, with this simple, heartfelt homage. However, it’s been [...]

Famous Fake Quotes of Teddy Roosevelt #2 – Metaphor President

Sometimes, when taken out of context, satire can turn against its user. Jonathon Swift discovered this first hand thanks to his essay, ‘A Modest Proposal,’ when several political enemies accused him of cannibalism and had him thrown in jail. Swift died in prison, but misread satire can have a positive effect, as Teddy found out [...]

The Afternoon Catapult Gazette, Vol. 13 – March 1576

After a particularly strange week for large projectile warfare, our Editor expected to see a dynamic fluctuation in this week’s charts. King Phillip’s condemnation of flammable oils pushed Flaming Wooden Spike Ball (FWSB) use down in Spain, but, in France, thanks to surplus fuel supply, sales skyrocketed, and fire flew brilliantly throughout the countryside. So, [...]

Famous Fake Quotes of Teddy Roosevelt #1 – Tooth Hurty

A man’s no stronger than his wife’s teeth, and he’s worth about a nickel less.” Theodore Roosevelt July 10, 1902 Washington, DC Quite the golden example of Roosevelt’s supreme sense of political humor, this quote is a clear jibe at rival Democratic party members in the South, who, at the time, had become notorious in [...]